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发信人: Christy (绿叶~捣鼓六仙捣毁仙), 信区: English
标 题: Anger and Pride (I) --By Oriana Fallaci
发信站: 哈工大紫丁香 (2003年01月24日12:38:25 星期五), 站内信件
Anger and Pride
by Oriana Fallaci
(translated from the Italian by Chris and Paola Newman)
[Translators’ note: This piece, and the introduction that precedes it, appe
ared in the Italian newspaper Corriere della Sera on September 29, 2001. The
few translations we’ve seen since then since have struck us as too literal
to properly convey the meaning and immediacy of Fallaci’s Italian prose to
an American audience. We thought it worth a try. Comments can be sent to cm
newman99@hotmail.com. Because of its length, the piece is divided into two p
osts.]
Introduction by Ferruccio de Bortolo:
With this extraordinary piece, Oriana Fallaci breaks a decade of silence. A
very long silence. Our most celebrated female writer (she calls herself a wr
iter and refuses to use the word “journalist” anymore) lives a good part o
f the year in Manhattan. She doesn’t answer the phone, opens the door rarel
y, and goes out even less. She never gives interviews. Everyone has tried, n
o-one has succeeded. Isolated. But history and destiny saw to it that the ce
nter of the modern apocalypse opened, like a Dantesque abyss, not far from h
er lovely and literary home. The shockwave of the morning of September 11 di
sturbed even Oriana’s hermit-like--and hermetically sealed--repose. She ope
ns the door, seeming to marvel at the unfamiliar gesture... Her glance is at
once tender and ferocious. Oriana has been working for years on a very impo
rtant work, awaited by all the world, among piles of documents in a disorder
that only appears as such, with warriorlike fervor. I asked her to write wh
at she had seen, experienced, felt after that Tuesday, and Oriana gathered a
few pages of emotions and thoughts. “I leave shreds of my soul on every ex
perience,” she wrote some years ago. It’s still true, very true. These are
bracing thoughts. Explosive ones. Thoughts to reason over and reflect on. O
n America, on Italy, on the Islamic world. On patriotism (it’s surprising w
hat she says about patriotism). Invectives and theses that surge at once fro
m the head and from the heart, or rather from the head toward the heart. She
bursts out: “Someone had to say these things. I said them. Now leave me in
peace. The door is closed again. And I don’t want to reopen it.” Her usua
l talons. People are going to be talking about this piece. And how.
----------------------------------------------------------------
You ask me to speak, this time. You ask me to break at least this once the s
ilence I’ve chosen, that I’ve imposed on myself these many years to avoid
mingling with chattering insects. And I’m going to. Because I’ve heard tha
t in Italy too there are some who rejoice just as the Palestinians of Gaza d
id the other night on TV. “Victory! Victory!” Men, women, children. Assumi
ng you can call those who do such a thing man, woman, child. I’ve heard tha
t some of the insects of means, politicians or so-called politicians, intell
ectuals or so-called intellectuals, not to mention others not worthy of the
title of citizen, are behaving pretty much the same way. They say: “Good. I
t serves America right.” And I am very very, very angry. Angry with an ange
r that is cold, lucid, rational. An anger that eliminates every detachment,
every indulgence. An anger that compels me to respond and demands above all
that I spit on them. I spit on them. Angry as I am, the African-American poe
t Maya Angelou roared the other day: “Be angry. It’s good to be angry, it’
s healthy.” And I don’t know whether it’s healthy for me. But I know that
it won’t be healthy for them, I mean those who admire Osama Bin Laden, tho
se who express comprehension or sympathy or solidarity for him. Your request
has triggered a detonator that’s been waiting too long to explode. You’ll
see. You also ask me to tell how I experienced this apocalypse. To give, in
other words, my testimony. Very well, I’ll start with that. I was at home,
which is in the center of Manhattan. At exactly nine o’clock I had a sensa
tion of danger, of a danger that perhaps would not touch me, but that undoub
tedly concerned me. It’s the sensation you feel in war, or rather in combat
, when every pore of your skin feels the bullet or the rocket as it approach
es, and you perk up your ears and yell at the person next to you: “Down! Ge
t down!” I pushed it away. It’s not like I was in Vietnam. It’s not like
I was in one of the many wars, those fucking wars that have tortured my life
since World War II. I was in New York for God's sake, on a marvellous Septe
mber morning in 2001. But the sensation still possessed me, inexplicably. So
I did something I never do in the morning and turned on the TV. The audio w
asn’t working. The screen was. And on every channel--and here there are alm
ost a hundred--you saw a tower of the World Trade Center burning like a gian
t match. A short circuit? A small plane gone off course? Or an act of delibe
rate terrorism? I stayed there almost paralyzed, fixed on that tower, and wh
ile I fixed on it, while I asked myself those three questions, another plane
appeared on the screen. White, huge. An airliner. It was flying extremely l
ow. Flying low, it turned toward the second tower like a bomber who draws a
bead on a target and then hurls himself at it. That’s when I understood. I
also understood because in that same moment the audio came back on and trans
mitted a chorus of primal screams. Repeated and primal. “God! Oh, God! Oh,
God, God, God! Gooooooood!” And the plane went into that second tower like
a knife going into a stick of butter.
By now it was quarter past nine. Don’t ask me what I felt during those fift
een minutes. I don’t know, I don’t remember. I was a piece of ice. Even my
brain was ice. I don’t even remember whether certain things I saw were fro
m the first tower or the second. For example, the people who threw themselve
s from the eightieth or ninetieth floor to avoid being burned alive. They br
oke the glass of the windows, they climbed up and jumped out like someone wh
o jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on. They came down so slowly, wa
ving their arms and legs, swimming in the air. Yes, they seemed to swim in t
he air, never arriving. Around the thirtieth floor though, they sped up. The
y started to gesture desperately, penitently I imagine, almost as though the
y were shouting for help. And maybe they really were. Finally they fell like
rocks and splat. You know, I thought I’d seen everything in war. I’d cons
idered myself vaccinated against war, and in substance I am. Nothing surpris
es me anymore. Not even when I get angry, not even when I get indignant. But
in war I’d always seen people who died by the hand of others. I’d never s
een people who die killing themselves, throwing themselves without parachute
s from the eightieth or ninetieth or hundredth floor. In war, I’d always se
en things that explode. That blow up in all directions. And I’d always hear
d a huge racket. Those two towers though, didn’t explode. The first implode
d, swallowed itself. The second fused and melted. It melted just like a stic
k of butter placed on the fire. And it all happened, or so it seemed to me,
in tomblike silence. Is that possible? Was that silence real, or was it insi
de me?
I also have to say that in war I’d always seen a limited number of deaths.
Every battle, two or three hundred dead. Four hundred at most. Like at Dak T
o in Vietnam. And when the battle was finished, the Americans would gather u
p and count them. I couldn’t believe my eyes. In the massacre of Mexico Cit
y, the one where I caught a fair number of bullets myself, they gathered at
least eight hundred dead. And when, thinking me dead, they stuck me in the m
orgue, the cadavers I soon found around and on myself seemed like a deluge.
Well, almost fifty thousand people worked in the two towers. And very few ha
d time to evacuate. The elevators didn’t work any more, obviously, and to g
o down on foot from the highest floors would have taken an eternity. Flames
permitting. We’ll never know the number of dead. (Forty thousand, fifty tho
usand?) The Americans will never tell, so as not to underline the intensity
of this apocalypse. So as not to give satisfaction to Osama Bin Laden and en
courage other apocalypses. And anyway the two abysses that absorbed those te
ns of thousands of creatures are too deep. At most the workers will unearth
pieces of scattered members. A nose here, a finger there. Or else a kind of
paste that seems like ground coffee but is actually organic material. The re
sidue of bodies pulverized in a flash. Yesterday the mayor Guiliani sent mor
e than ten thousand body bags. But they went unused.
What do I feel for the kamikazes who died with them? No respect. No pity. No
, not even pity, I who always wind up giving in to pity. I’ve always dislik
ed kamikazes, that is people who commit suicide in order to kill others. Sta
rting with the Japanese ones from World War II. I never considered them Piet
ro Miccas who torch the powder and go up with the citadel in order to block
the arrival of the enemy troops at Torino. I never considered them soldiers.
Even less do I consider them martyrs or heroes, as Mr. Arafat, hollering an
d spitting saliva, described them to me in 1972. (Or when I interviewed him
at Amman, where his marshalls were also training the Badder-Meinhof terroris
ts.) I just consider them vain. Vain people who instead of seeking glory in
cinema or politics or sports seek it in the death of themselves and others.
A death that, in place of an Oscar or a ministerial seat or a medal, will ge
t them (they think) admiration. And, in the case of those who pray to Allah,
a place in the paradise that the Koran speaks of: the paradise where heroes
get to fuck houris. I’ll bet they’re even physically vain. I have in fron
t of me a photo of the two kamikaze I speak of in my novel Inshallah: the no
vel that begins with the destruction of the American base (more than four hu
ndred dead) and the French base (more than three hundred fifty dead) at Beir
ut. They’d had it taken before going to die, this photo, and before going t
o die they’d gone to the barber. See what lovely haircuts. What pomaded mou
staches, what well-groomed little beards, what coquettish sideburns...
I can just imagine how Mr. Arafat would seethe with rage to hear me. There’
s bad blood between us, you know. He never forgave me, either for the scorch
ing differences of opinion we had during that meeting or for the judgments I
expressed about him in my book Interview With History. As for me, I never f
orgave him anything. Including the fact that an Italian journalist who impru
dently presented himself as “a friend of mine” found himself with a revolv
er pointed at his heart. So we don’t see each other any more. It’s too bad
. Because if I met him again, or rather if I were to grant him an audience,
I’d scream in his face who the martyrs and heroes are. I’d scream: “Illus
trious Mr. Arafat, the martyrs are the passengers of the four airplanes that
were hijacked and transformed into human bombs. Among them is a four year o
ld little girl who disintegrated in the second tower. Illustrious Mr. Arafat
, the martyrs are the employees who worked in the two towers and at the Pent
agon. Illustrious Mr. Arafat, the martyrs are the firemen who died trying to
save them. And do you know who the heroes are? The passengers of the flight
that was supposed to throw itself into the White House but instead crashed
into the woods in Pennsylvania because they fought back! There ought to be a
paradise for them, illustrious Mr. Arafat. The real problem is that you are
now a perpetual head of state. You play the monarch. You visit the pope, an
nounce that you disapprove of terrorism, send condolences to Bush.” And in
his chameleonlike ability to contradict himself, he’d even be capable of te
lling me I’m right. But let’s change the subject. I’m very sick, as you k
now, and talking with the likes of Arafat gives me a fever.
I prefer to talk about the invulnerability that many, in Europe, attributed
to America. Invulnerability? What invulnerability? The more democratic and o
pen a society is, the more it’s exposed to terrorism. The more a country is
free, not governed by a police regime, the more it risks hijackings or mass
acres like the ones that took place for many years in Italy and Germany and
other parts of Europe. And that now take place, magnified, in America. It’s
no accident that non-democratic countries, countries governed by a police r
egime, have always hosted and financed and helped terrorists. The Soviet Uni
on, the Soviet Union's satellites and the People’s Republic of China, for e
xample. Ghadaffi's Libya, Iraq, Iran, Syria, Arafat's Lebanon, Egypt itself,
that same Saudi Arabia of which Osama Bin Laden is a citizen, Pakistan, Afg
hanistan, of course, and all the Islamic African regions. In those countries
’ airports or airplanes I have always felt safe. Tranquil as a sleeping new
born. The only thing I was afraid of was being arrested because I used to wr
ite bad things about the terrorists. In European airports and airplanes, on
the other hand, I always felt uneasy. In American airports and airplanes I a
ctually felt nervous. Twice as nervous in New York. (Not in Washington DC, t
hough. The plane at the Pentagon was a complete surprise to me.) In my opini
on it was ultimately never an issue of “if”: it was always one of “when”
. Why do you think that on Tuesday morning my subconscious felt that anxiety
, that sensation of danger? Why do you think that despite my habits I turned
on the TV? Why do you think that one of the three questions I was asking my
self while the first tower was burning and the audio wasn’t working was tha
t of a terrorist attack? Why do you think that when the second airplane appe
ared I immediately understood? Since America is the strongest country in the
world, the richest, the most powerful, the most modern, almost everyone fel
l into that trap. The Americans did themselves, at times. But America’s vul
nerability comes precisely from its strength, its wealth, its power and its
modernity. It’s the usual story of the dog chasing its own tail.
It comes from America’s multi-ethnic being, its liberality, its respect for
its citizens and guests. Example: about 24 million Americans are Muslim-Ara
bs. And when a Mustafa or a Mohammed comes, say from Afghanistan, to visit h
is uncle, nobody tells him he can’t attend pilot training school to learn h
ow to fly a 757 jet airplane. Nobody can keep him from enrolling in a Univer
sity (something I hope will change) to study chemistry and biology: the two
sciences necessary to wage bacteriological war. Nobody. Not even if the gove
rnment fears that this son of Allah might hijack that 757 or that he might t
oss a vial full of bacteria into the reservoir and unleash a disaster. (I sa
y “if” because this time the government knew absolutely nothing and the di
sgrace of the CIA and FBI goes beyond all bounds. If I were President of the
United States I’d send them all packing for stupidity with well-placed kic
ks to the posterior.) Having said that, let’s go back to the original thoug
ht. What are the symbols of American strength, wealth, power and modernity?
Certainly not jazz and rock and roll, not chewing-gum or hamburgers, Broadwa
y or Hollywood. It’s their skyscrapers. Their Pentagon. Their science. Thei
r technology. Those impressive skyscrapers, so tall, so beautiful that while
you raise your eyes to gaze at them you almost forget the pyramids and the
divine buildings of our past. Those gigantic airplanes, oversized, which the
y now use as they once used sailing ships or trucks because everything here
is moved by airplane. Everything. The mail, fresh fish, ourselves. (And don’
t forget that they invented the air war. Or at least they’re the ones who d
eveloped it to the point of absurdity.) That terrifying Pentagon, that fortr
ess which scares you just looking at it. That all-present, all-powerful scie
nce. That chilling technology that in a few short years has completely chang
ed our daily lives, our millennial ways of communicating, eating, living. An
d where did he strike them, the reverend Osama Bin Laden? In the skyscrapers
and in the Pentagon. How? With airplanes, with science and technology. By t
he way: do you know what gets me the most about this wretched multi-milliona
ire, this AWOL playboy who instead of courting blonde princesses and running
wild in the night clubs (as he used to do in Beirut when he was 20 years ol
d) enjoys himself by killing people in the name of Mohammed and Allah? The f
act that his endless wealth comes from the earnings of a corporation special
izing in demolition, and that he himself is a demolitions expert. Demolition
is an American specialty.
When we met I found you almost stupefied by the heroic efficiency and admira
ble unity with which the Americans have faced this Apocalypse. That’s right
. Despite all the shortcomings that always get rubbed in their face--that I
myself always rub in their face (though those of Europe, and of Italy in par
ticular, are even more serious)--America is a country with important things
to teach us. And speaking of heroic efficiency, let me sing a paean to the M
ayor of New York. That Rudolph Giuliani to whom we Italians should kneel in
gratitude. Because he has an Italian last name and an Italian origin and he
makes us look good before the whole world. Rudolph Giuliani is a great mayor
, one of the greatest. And that’s coming from someone who is never happy wi
th anything or anyone, starting with myself. He’s a mayor worthy of another
great mayor with an Italian last name, Fiorello la Guardia, and many of our
mayors ought to go and study under him. They ought to come to him with bowe
d heads, or better with ash on their heads, and ask him: “Signor Giuliani,
sir, please tell us how it’s done.” He doesn’t delegate his duties to oth
ers, no. He doesn’t waste his time with bullshit and greed. He doesn’t spl
it himself between the tasks of a mayor and those of a minister or deputy (i
s anybody listening in the three cities of Stendhal--Naples, Florence and Ro
me?). He ran over there immediately, and immediately entered the second towe
r, at the risk of being turned to ashes with all the others. He only made it
out by a hair and only by chance. And in the space of four days he put this
city back on its feet. A city with nine and a half million inhabitants, min
d you, and almost two million in Manhattan alone. How he did it, I don’t kn
ow. He’s sick like me, the poor man. The cancer that comes and returns has
got him, too. And, like me, he pretends to be healthy: he works anyway. But
I work at a desk, for God’s sake, sitting down! He, on the other hand... He
looked like a general who joins the battle in person. A soldier who charges
with his bayonet: “Come on, people, come on!!! Let’s roll up our sleeves,
move!” But he could do it because those people were, are, like him. People
without airs and without laziness, my father would have said, and with ball
s. As for the admirable ability to unite, the almost martial compactness wit
h which the Americans respond to disaster and to the enemy, well: I have to
admit that then and there I was astounded as well. I knew, yes, that it had
exploded at the time of Pearl Harbor, that is when the people huddled around
Roosevelt and Roosevelt entered the war against the Germany of Hitler and t
he Italy of Mussolini and the Japan of Hirohito. I had caught a whiff of it,
yes, after Kennedy’s assassination. But that had been followed by the war
in Vietnam, the lacerating rift caused by the war in Vietnam, and in a certa
in sense it had reminded me of their Civil War of a century and a half ago.
So, when I saw whites and blacks crying in each other’s arms--and I mean in
each other’s arms--when I saw Democrats and Republicans arm in arm singing
“God Bless America”, when I saw them drop all their differences, I was fl
abbergasted. Just as I was when I heard Bill Clinton (someone for whom I've
never harbored much tenderness) declare: “We must stand behind Bush. We mus
t have faith in our president.” I felt the same when those same words were
forcefully repeated by his wife Hillary, now senator for the State of New Yo
rk. And when they were reiterated by Lieberman, the ex-Democratic candidate
for the vice-presidency. (Only the defeated Al Gore remained squalidly silen
t). I felt the same when Congress voted unanimously to accept war and punish
those responsible. Oh, if only Italy would learn this lesson! It’s such a
divided country, Italy. So factious, so poisoned by tribal pettiness! They h
ate each other even within their own parties in Italy. They can’t stick tog
ether even when they have the same emblem, or the same banner, for God’s sa
ke! Jealous, bilious, vain, small, they think only of their own personal int
erests. Of their own careers, their own petty glory, their own small-town po
pularity. For the sake of their personal interests they spite each other, th
ey betray each other, they accuse each other, they expose each other... I am
absolutely convinced that, if Osama Bin Laden were to blow up Giotto’s tow
er or the Tower of Pisa, the opposition would blame the government. And the
government would blame the opposition. The heads of the government and the h
eads of the opposition would blame their own party people and comrades. And
having said this, let me explain where the ability to unite that characteriz
es the Americans comes from.
It comes from their patriotism. I don’t know whether in Italy you saw and u
nderstood what happened in New York when Bush went to thank the rescue men (
and women) who are digging in the ruins of the two towers trying to save som
e survivor but only coming up with the occasional nose or finger. In spite o
f this, they do it without giving up. Without resigning themselves, so that
if you ask them how they do it they say: “I can allow myself to be exhauste
d, but not to be defeated.” All of them. The young, the very young, the old
, the middle aged. White, black, yellow, brown, purple... You saw them, didn
’t you? While Bush was thanking them all they did was wave their little Ame
rican flags, raise their clenched fists, and roar: “USA! USA!” In a totali
tarian country I’d have thought: ”Look how nicely organized this was by th
e Powers That Be!” Not in America. In America you don’t organize these thi
ngs. You don’t manage them, you don’t command them. Especially in a disenc
hanted metropolis like New York and with workers like New York workers. New
York workers are real pieces of work. Freer than the wind. They don’t even
obey their unions. But if you touch their flag, or their Patria… In English
the word Patria doesn’t exist. To say Patria you have to put two words tog
ether. Father Land. Mother Land. Native Land. Or you can simply say My Count
ry. But they have the noun “patriotism.” They have the adjective “patriot
ic.” And apart from France, I can’t imagine a country more patriotic than
America. God! I was so moved to see those workers clenching their fists and
waving their flags and roaring USA-USA-USA, without anyone ordering them to.
And I felt a kind of humiliation. Because I can’t even begin to imagine It
alian workers waving the tricolor and roaring Italia-Italia. Oh, I’ve seen
them wave plenty of red flags in the marches and rallies. Rivers, lakes, of
red flags. But never very many tricolor flags. None at all, actually. Ill-le
d or tyrannized by an arrogant left devoted to the Soviet Union, they always
left the tricolor flags to their adversaries. Not that the adversaries made
very good use of them, I’d say. Nor did they waste them either, thank God.
And those who go to Mass, ditto. As for that yahoo with the green shirt and
tie, he doesn’t even know what colors make up the tricolor. I-am-Lombard,
I-am-Lombard. That guy wants to take us back to the wars between between Flo
rence and Siena. So the result is that today you see the Italian flag only a
t the Olympics if you happen to win a medal. Worse: you see it only in the s
tadiums, when there’s an international soccer match. Which is also, by the
way, the only time you’ll ever hear a cry of Italia-Italia.
--
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